A Look Back

Writing is like an old friend. I forget about it for months, on occasion longer, and then as soon as I start typing I'm instantly in my zone, and immediately zenned out. Dan would probably argue that I could get that same high telling my life story to Millie, and he's not too far off. Girl is a talker. But tonight, writing it shall be.

So I moved. Rather hesitantly actually. I didn't share my hesitation with very many people, though I wanted to. When I pulled up my site, I had a draft waiting for me that I never could bear to publish last year:


A couple of months ago, someone that I know at work mentioned a job opening that he thought I would be interested in. It's in operations, which is my background, and it's with a part of the business in which I am completely unfamiliar. Due to some circumstances that are lengthy and difficult to explain, I was in the market for a new position, so I decided to interview. The only challenge is that it's in Fort Worth, Texas. Yikes. I flew down to interview face-to-face, and then got a call the day that Dan and I were scheduled to head to the lake cabin with his family. I got the job offer, and as soon as I hung up the phone, I cried for the next 45 minutes with the door shut to my office. I've always been super excited about new jobs. Always. But for some reason, I don't find myself excited about this one at all. It feels rushed, and I can't help but wonder if I made a mistake. I think part of my unease is having to leave Dan, too. I tried so hard not to fall hard for him. I knew I wouldn't be here long term - that I couldn't be here long term - and the last thing I wanted was to fall in love with someone while I was here. But as much as I tried, it happened, and now there's that.

As I type, there are two men packing up my apartment. The apartment that I absolutely love. This was my first apartment all to myself, and I loved making it all mine. From the pink map in my living room, to my obnoxiously loud quilt, it's the apartment where I got to be me. Maybe that's why I'm so sad about leaving Minnesota. I feel more me right now at this point in my life than I ever have. Which can't possibly make sense. But I think the me I am now is someone I always wanted to be, but just never was. Maybe it's the culmination of dating someone who pushes me a little out of my comfort zone pretty frequently, or feeling accomplished at surviving, and thriving, on a great big move here, or learning a new job and loving it, or figuring out that I'm capable of so much more than I thought. But I just feel...happy. And satisfied. And settled.

Now I have to do it all over again. I know I can. I know that I'll rock this job. And I know that there will be other apartments to decorate. New friends to make. New park trails to explore. Onward then.


I fought against Texas through December. And I'm still not sure I love it here. But all of the other fears have worked themselves out.

I'm in an even better apartment, that's more me than the last one.
Bonus: Millie LOVES watching the birds fly through our courtyard in her window perch.

I'm not rocking my job yet, but I am finally understanding it. Baby steps, y'all.
Bonus: I work with some fan-freakin-tastic people. Seriously, they make my heart happy and I can tell we'll be great friends.

I haven't explored all the parks around here, but I have a trail in my backyard that runs parallel to the Trinity River.
Bonus: It's warm enough here that I can run all year round.


I found a CSA that I pick up from every other week, and I love getting local organic produce. There is a juice bar near my house, and I'm within walking distance of tons of restaurants, Starbucks, and a movie theater and performance hall. I really couldn't have asked for anything better. My biggest complaint is most definitely the long-distance relationship. It's working, but goodness I miss him. Every day. Something will give this year though, and we will find ourselves in the same city again. Stay tuned for more on that.

I'm not sure what is in store for 2016. Will I stay? Will I go again? Will he come here? Who knows. But what I do know is this, two cities down. I've got this. Bring on the challenge.

A New Yoga Studio and Amazing Dinner!

I love weekends that are super fun without being hectic. That is a perfect description of this past one for me. There is a yoga studio near my house that I've been wanting to get in for awhile. They run a Vinyasa yoga class a couple of days a week from 7-8 PM and then on Saturdays at noon. That is absolutely perfect for my schedule, and the studio is within walking distance. I decided to check it out, so after sleeping in on Saturday morning I strolled that direction. It was a small class - myself, the instructor, and a gay couple, Michael and George. We walked through a little over an hour of poses, including crow and a headstand. I've never been able to successfully hold a crow position before, and as it turns out, my gaze was the only thing stopping me. I'd been looking down at the floor every time rather than looking ahead. I thought I was lacking the strength, but I was just throwing off my balance. The headstand I did against a wall. I haven't really done any regular inversions since high school, so that's going to take awhile to master. Every time I did something well, Michael and George would get super excited for me, and it made me want to carry them around with me for the day. I feel like they would be excellent life cheerleaders.

Saturday night Dan and I decided to check out a restaurant in downtown Minneapolis called Brasserie Zentral. It's a European restaurant, and y'all. Y'ALL. It was SO good.

*I feel like I shouldn't use the words European and y'all in the same sentence.

**Also, we looked really cute. My new black dress rocked, and Dan had on a linen shirt and slacks. This is irrelevant to this story. But seriously. 

***Those curls of his make me happy.

I started off with a creamed asparagus soup topped with hazelnuts, and a glass of delicious white wine. Dan started off with gnocchi with lamb and braised red cabbage, and an Old Fashioned. While everything that we ate was absolutely amazing, his gnocchi was my favorite. It was just melt-in-your-mouth. Super thankful he's a fan of sharing or it would have gotten nasty with me demanding that he give me a bite or seven. For our main course, I got the quark spaetzel, and Dan got the speck wrapped rabbit loin. (I have a confession. I totally had to Google my dish. I didn't know what either of those things were. Chili's in my small town didn't serve either. Moving right along.) My baby pasta had rabbit in it, which was wonderful. I've had rabbit before, but not any that tasted this yummy. We decided to split a dessert, and got the chocolate torte, which was filled with apricot preserves, and topped with chocolate ganache, hazelnut brittle, and chocolate ice cream. Dan got a cappuccino that was perfectly foamy, and I finished off a second glass of wine. When the waiter brought our check, he let us know he comped dessert, and the receipt said "Hooray for dessert!" with a $0 charge. It was such a fun little surprise! It got me super excited about my upcoming trip to Europe for my birthday. 

Sunday, we met up again, and decided to make a salad since we'd eaten so heavy the night before. We grabbed a ton of random things and made one of the best salads ever, because we are awesome in the kitchen, ha! I also made cookies. I'm going to a lake house with Dan's family in a few weeks, and I may bring them, because who doesn't love cookies?! I haven't made many since I've been here, so I figured it was time to bust some out. Such a yummy and fun weekend!

FLORIDA!

This week I had the opportunity to head to Florida with some girlfriends for a much overdue beach vacation. I've known these gals all for 17ish years - a very long time - and we've been wonderful friends despite lots of changes in one another's lives. Jenn and Cyndi still live in Tennessee, I'm obviously in Minnesota, and Vicki lives in Florida. We all flew down, and stayed with Vicki, which was a nice break from paying for a hotel. I can't possibly describe all the fun things we did - late nights up talking, hours and hours sitting in clear, warm ocean water, sharing tears and hugs, squealing at Magic Mike, ice cream, a tour in the Everglades - but even if we hadn't done any of the "extras", it was wonderful to simply have some girl time. I missed my friends.

I'm sitting at the airport now, typing this up, and thinking of how blessed I am to have such wonderful, supportive women in my life that absolutely adore me as much as I adore them. I miss them already, but I'm leaving Florida with such a happy and full heart.

Celebrating the Fourth

Happy belated 4th of July! This weekend was so, so much fun. I only have one requirement for every 4th: fireworks. Preferably A LOT. I absolutely love them; how can you not?!

I had to work during the day Saturday, but got off early afternoon and met up with Dan. We went to a Saints baseball game in St.Paul at a new stadium there, which was absolutely gorgeous. My favorite thing about it? Sooooo many bathrooms! Every woman knows the struggle of bathrooms at a stadium. We got hot dogs, enjoyed some yummy beer, and had super awesome seats to enjoy the game. Baseball is probably my favorite game to watch live. 

The city of St.Paul paired up with the stadium to do the city fireworks there after the game, which was perfect. The game went into a 10th inning, but after it ended the announcer came on and instructed everyone to clap twice on the count of three. We all did, which threw the stadium into darkness, and then they launched a beautiful fireworks display. I watched them with the biggest smile, arms intertwined with Dan's, thinking about how magical it all felt. I think magical is the best description for a night sky that is lit up with multi-colored sparkles. Magical is also how I think it would feel to roll around in a pool full of glitter, but I digress.

Sunday, Dan and I met up early and went to brunch prior to heading over to the Minnesota Arboretum. I'll be honest, I'd never even heard the term arboretum until he mentioned that he bought us tickets to it a few weeks ago. I had no idea what to expect. It began with the University of Minnesota, and has over 1200 acres of gardens, trees, prairies, and various other things. It.Was.Gorgeous! So, we need to stop a minute so I can set the stage for you. One of the first sections that we hit was the herb garden, and right before we walked in, a tiny little chipmunk ran across the path. A CHIPMUNK. As in, they live and sing in Disney movies, adorable little chipmunk! I can't even, y'all. It was a legit struggle to not squeal louder than I did; however, I maintained my composure like a very responsible lame adult. Mostly. 

We wandered through herbs, roses, peonies (daisies are my favorite, but these are an incredibly close second). We walked through the woods and saw an owl hanging out in a tree (you can see him if you click the picture). We walked through the prairie, where we were absolutely swarmed by some obnoxious little bugs. I laughed the most here - I was frantically swatting nonstop with the map, and Dan took off his shirt to swat. We looked ridiculous, but I thought they were trying to kill us and take us back for the winter for their babies. I was ready to get OUT of the prairie. Other than the bugs though, all the long flowering grass was beautiful and peaceful. Then we went through a hedge maze, which was super fun. We took turns choosing the path, and all of mine seemed to lead to dead ends. I'm pretty much the most directionally-challenged person ever, so that isn't surprising. 

We came back to my house, watched the World Cup and made homemade pizza. Dan made me try his, which was a kalamata olive tapenade with roasted red peppers and mozzarella. He knows I hate olives, but insisted I try. I ate three pieces with OLIVES, and I actually liked them. Apparently, adding onion and garlic makes everything better. A televised sports game and olives - WHO AM I LATELY?! Seriously, that's Twilight Zone level stuff. But you know what? Bring on the new things...all the new things.

Some Sunday Randomness

Y'all know that these randomness posts are a snapshot into my head, right? Imagine a hundred people shouting various things your direction - I feel like that's where I'm at right now. Perhaps I should look into meditating and quieting my busy self down, huh? Here's what is happening in the very average life of Kris.

Thursday was one year since my divorce finalized. How is that even possible? A full year. It's been a year and a half since we separated. In some ways, it feels like forever ago. In others, it feels like yesterday. Between that date, the pending sale of my home in Tennessee, and PMSing like a mofo, I was an emotional wreck last week. All the feels. All of them. I'm good, he's good, but it's still a divorce, and that is a sad thing no matter what the circumstances were. Two weeks ago someone at work gave me some great advice. He told me that failing was inevitable, but there are two rules to remember when it happens: fail quickly, and learn from it. That's certainly advice that can be applied to life in general. Though I can't change the past, I can make sure that I take all of the lessons I've learned (so, so SO many) and apply them going forward.

I kindof want to write something worthwhile. Something bigger.

Speaking of things I adore - this guy, y'all. He's the sweetest. That is all.

Oh wait, that is NOT all. Can we talk about the term "boyfriend" real quick? So we've been dating for almost 7 months now. I'm pretty sure that term is appropriate at this point, but it makes me feel like a 15-year old high-schooler with braces and pigtails. I get it. That's the acceptable term, and adults everywhere are using it. Can we universally come up with a grown-up term for "boyfriend"? When we do, let's PSA the heck out of it. In the meantime, I will continue to blush any time that I need to use that phrase.

I've been thinking quite a bit about my career lately. Am I doing it because I'm comfortable there? Because I'm scared to go somewhere else or try something new? Because I'm passionate about it? I'm not sure what the answers to those questions are, but I think they are good questions to ask myself and think about. Lots of thinking about my future. Not in an overwhelming OMG I HAVE TO PLAN kindof way; just...thinking.

I have the travel bug. I want to go everywhere and see absolutely everything. There is such a great big world, and I *need* to explore it. I'm trying to travel somewhere overseas for my birthday in October. I'm not sure where yet, though Germany has been tossed around recently. I'd also love to go on a mission trip at some point. I'd love to be involved in building orphanages, or teaching children, or something to that effect. I'm not ready to adopt quite yet, so in the meantime, I need to find some other ways to be involved. I'd like to sponsor a child, too. I did some research a couple of years ago, and definitely have some organizations in mind, but haven't actually pushed the button. If I can't help all of the children, maybe helping one would make a difference for now. Once my house sells, that will be my first order of business.

I have so many more things going on in my head, but I've gotta make lunch for tomorrow, so I'm out for tonight. Let's all brace ourselves for Monday, shall we?

Going With the Flow...

As a "professional" planner, it's sometimes difficult for me to enjoy the ride of spontaneity. I've written numerous times about how that's been one of my greatest challenges the last year and a half - throwing away all of my plans and just leaping into the unknown, and hoping things fall into place. I still have a tendency to try and plan my next five, ten years out, but every time my mind starts to wander I remind myself to stop, and just sit still for awhile. 

This weekend, a new realization hit. I am ridiculously, stupid happy. Like, really, really happy. I have no idea what the next month looks like. No idea what the next year looks like. And for the first time, in a very long time, it's okay to not know what will happen. Sure, there are some things I would change, but isn't that just life? There are always things to change. But this place of simply enjoying where I'm at? It's my new favorite. 

I'm just going to bask in the blissful glow of my life right now, exactly as it is, and be...happy.

Hiking in Minnesota

Prior to moving to Minneapolis, I was convinced that living in a city would be amazing, and that the constant stream of things to do would satisfy my need to do something different than I did in Smalltown, USA for the first thirty years of my life. And that's true. Being in the city is amazing, and I absolutely love it here so very much. But (and I never thought I'd say this) there are definitely things that I miss about living in the country. I miss the quiet the most. Here, there is a constant hum of noise no matter where I am. I'm sitting in my apartment right now with the windows open, and I can hear traffic, and construction, and airplanes. I miss sitting on my porch and not hearing a single thing. I also miss the stars. Every night that I'm out past dark I find myself straining to find the Big and Little Dippers, and most nights it's just too bright.

There are some places to "hike" in the city - really expansive parks, trails through heavily wooded areas, and even some trails along the river (though, it's a bit of a stretch to call that hiking) - but they pale in comparison to my latest trip up North. A couple months back a friend, who happens to be of the male variety, (do with that what you will) and I decided to spend a few days hiking, and began planning out our trip away. Since I've needed some wide-open green space, I was looking forward to this trip more than I can even begin to tell you. We decided to hike along the North Shore near Lake Superior. I've never been that far north, but since I've moved here numerous people have mentioned how beautiful of an area it is to explore. Lake Superior looks more like an ocean than a lake. It's absolutely gorgeous, and I was so surprised at how expansive it was. No matter where we seemed to go, it managed to sneak into the background.

We ended up covering about 27 miles over the course of 3 days, and saw some of the most spectacular views. Spectacular doesn't seem to do it justice; at times I wanted to gasp when we hit the peaks. Of course pictures don't adequately capture the scenery, but I took plenty.

Though choosing a favorite spot is impossible, one of my favorites was definitely a secluded little beach near the place that we stayed. We had a steep hike down an unmarked hill, and then it opened up to a perfect, completely untouched private beach secluded by giant rock cliffs. It was a stone beach, so I practiced skipping rocks on the water, and then took one to keep. When I got it home, I realized it has a natural design in it that resembles a heart. Appropriate.

Other than some knee issues, I wasn't as sore as I'd anticipated. By the third day, my knee was aching really, really badly and it was a legit struggle not to focus on it. I usually don't ever have any issues with it since the surgeries, but the uneven terrain and all the uphill hiking we had done the previous couple of days were rough on it, and despite icing, it was still a little swollen. We only did 7 miles on the last day, so I toughed it out to see Eagle Mountain, which is the highest point in Minnesota. Totally worth it. One of the best views of the trip.

There were also s'mores with peanut butter (because y'all already know) and a stop at a little town called Grand Marais. It was absolutely charming. There were sailboats, and I grabbed a coffee with local maple syrup and homemade whipped cream at a little coffee house outside next to the water. We also stopped at a famous pie place, Betty's Pies, and grabbed a couple slices to go. Totes worth the hype - they were exceptional - and the perfect way to end our little trip.